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Fun and Entertainment




Clever Sayings ... Fun One-liners ... Silly Bumper Stickers... Seen on T-shirts, etc. 

Have you read this one:

  Will Work for Liquor.
  got beer?
  Alcohol may be the road to nowhere, but at least its the scenic route.
  Drinks Well With Others.
  That's MR. Bartender to you.
  That's MS. Bartender to you.

  How can I be so thirsty in the morning, when I drank so much last night?

  There are NO bad cocktails, just bad drinkers.
  Official 7-Up® slogan:
    "Make 7 ... UP Yours".
  WHISKEY: Making Driving More Exciting Since 1903!
  When I was your age... We had to walk 2 miles, up hill, in zero degree weather, to get this drunk!
  Beer ... It's What's For Dinner.
  Drink Liquor ...
    Do stupid things easier and not remember.
  Life is too short ... to drink cheap liquor.
  Jack Daniel's Distillers®:  
    "Tribute:  131 Years, Seven Generations, One Recipe.  Enough Said."
  Challenge = Tequila.
     When life presents a challenge ... take your best shot.
  Slammed I Am!
    "I would drink beer with a goat, on a boat, in a box, in my sox, in a car, at a bar.  I do, I do, I do like beer!"     (spinoff on Dr. Seus)
  Paint Chips Make Me Thirsty.
    Chowing down lead paint chips can work up a thirst and lower your IQ.
  I See Drunk People.
(parody of the classic line from the movie, "The Sixth Sense")
  People Like You... 
    Are the reason people like me drink.
  It's Happy Hour!  Let's Drink!  It's 5:00 somewhere...
  I'm NOT an Alcoholic.
    I'm a Drunk.
    Alcoholics go to meetings.
  I Have a Beer Problem...
Joe and John split a quarter keg of beer.  There are (approx.) 41 mugs of beer to be drank from the keg, and each mug contains 12oz of beer.  After one hour and 4 mugs, Joe has to take a leak.  John however needs to take a leak after only 2 mugs during this time.  If both Joe and John continue drinking for six hours... How many leaks will be taken during this period by each and how many mugs will remain in the quarter of keg?
  Teamwork = Keg of Beer.
Teamwork is the ability to work as a group towards a common vision ... Even if that vision becomes extremely blurry while working.
  I Graduated with a 4.0 
     (Blood Alcohol Level).
  Never Underestimate the Power of Intoxicated People in Large Groups.
  Do you believe in Love at First Sight... or do I have to buy you another drink?
  Rehab is for Quitters.
  BEER:  Helping Ugly People Have Sex Since 1862!
  You call me DRUNK
     ... like it's a bad thing.
  Finish Your Beers... 
    (There are sober people in China!)
  ALCOHOL:  It's Cheaper Than Therapy!
  My Teachers Said I Could Be Anything...
     so I became Drunk.
  One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor...
  If You Can't Say Something Nice...
    Keep Drinking.


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Do you have "Bar Sayings" that you would like to share with other bartenders?  

The Bar Sayings must be silly lines pertaining to bars, restaurants, bartenders, drinking or alcohol only.  Not meant to be offensive ... Not meant to condone intoxication of drinkers ... Just for reading entertainment.

Submission Warning:  These are viewed by adults, but please keep it somewhat clean and not disgusting.  We reserve the right to decline any submission for any reason, like making us cringe or feel like vomiting.  Thank you and our viewers thank you!  Submit your name, initial, establishment's name and web address and we will credit your submission or link to your company page.  Thank you!
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All Bar Sayings facts that we have received by viewer emails are believed to belong to the public domain unless stated otherwise.  BARTENDER Magazine is not responsible for any errors in print or fact stated.  BARTENDER Magazine has no intent to misinform or mislead the reader in any fashion with the information listed.  The sayings are given for entertainment purposes only.

Original list of Sayings compiled 07/11/02 by


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Please remember:  Not to drink in excess.  Moderation is the key word.  Good judgment for yourself and your guests is most important to any successful party.  Drinking and driving do not mix!  The cocktail recipes herein are for your pleasure.  Enjoy in moderation.  Cheers!  -Ray Foley, Foley Publishing Corp.